A Man After Your Own Heart

O God, Father in heaven and earth,
I call to You like deep calls to deep over water.
Show me Your endless measure of grace.
Let tender mercies shine once again
From Your holy face.

Deep in my soul there’s a craving
To please the One who has saved me.
O God, though I have wandered so far,
You know that I’m still
A man after Your own heart.

I am driven by rivers of pride.
You are my rescue,
The Maker and Keeper of my life.
Lead me by the still waters again.
Use me in spite of the prodigal child
That You know I am.

Just as a deer runs to water
So does my soul to You, Father.
O God, though I have fallen so far,
You know that I’m still
A man after Your own heart.

Just as a deer runs to water
So does my soul to You, Father.
O God, though I have fallen so far,
You know that I’m still
A man after Your own heart.
I’m still a man after Your own heart.

– Billy Luz Sprague and Wayne Kirkpatrick

Don’t Get Me Wrong – I’m Not a Hurricane Kind of Guy..

Don’t get me wrong – I’m not a hurricane kind of guy. But I do enjoy hearing the sound of wind outside on occasion. A few nights ago, a storm blew into our area. Over the soft whispers of my wife’s prayers, I began to hear the rising sounds of trees swaying and crackling noises around the house as the wind applied instant pressure to areas of weakness in the structure. But I also heard our cowbell-sounding windchime outside on the back porch. The sound was pleasant — reassuring. Even as nature yawned and roared outside, the chime sounded a sweet ring of hope. Something about the deep peals satisfied me that everything was alright. In the midst of potentially frightening circumstances, the musical tones provided a reminder that we, sons of Adam, are here also. While there is rain and wind and other threatening elements of nature, a man-made chime hangs under our porch shelter — a reminder that we are here, and that we are not alone.

I Want to Be Like You

I want to be like you. At the end of my work day, when I’m so tired – even a little grumpy, you greet me at the door with a smile – usually with a compliment like, “You look nice today!” or some other sweet word. And on other days when things become so overwhelming, and I wonder if I can keep going, you tell me all is well, and that God is watching, and sometimes even testing, and He won’t put more on us than what we can bear. You calm my spirit and help me put things in the right perspective.

I want to be like you. When the needs of others interupt our day, and I’d rather be left alone, you reach out and go out of your way to help that person. You figure out how we can make a difference in that person’s life. And you go so far as to make phone calls to various agencies and businesses to come to the aid of a less fortunate person or family. I remember that for about fifteen years, you worked selflessly every year with Relay for Life, staying up most of the night, cheering on the walkers, thinking only about them. And while at times I become lost inside myself, you put others ahead of your own comfort.

I want to be like you. I dream of things and ways to minister, using the gifts that God has given me. You encourage me, and you give little pushes towards those dreams so that they become not just dreams, but realities – the kind of realities God sees and expects from us – to be doers of His Word, not just hearers.

I want to be like you because I can’t help but see the glass half empty many times, while you are a “glass half full” kind of girl.

I want to be like you. Whenever someone asks a favor, and I think about how this might impact my day – maybe hesitate to respond – you answer with an enthusiastic “yes!” And while I try and put things off until a better day, you put on your raincoat and make your way in the rain to help one of God’s creatures – human or otherwise. And I know it breaks your heart to see the homeless cats in our neighborhood, Sweetheart. Sometimes I think Saint Francis has become reincarnated in you.

I want to be like you. I often lose my way, while you shine like a beacon, lighting our path – unwavering in faith. I’m moved and inspired to be more than I am.

Day by day, you become a greater person – an example of what Christ expects in all of us – a daily dying to self.

I want to be like you. The times I lay in bed, sick, while you took care of me, bringing me all sorts of vitamins, liquids, and herbs I’ve never heard of. And when you finally fell ill yourself, you hardly allowed me to help you because you didn’t want to be a bother.

I want to be like you. You are out there sometimes, and everyone around knows when you are so excited about something – about life and God. Your exuberance is catching. And yes, I’m shy -sometimes afraid someone might notice me, and I shrink. But you understand.

Do you remember that day when we were listening to the radio – our first date? I kept thinking that you were passing all the beautiful (slow, mournful) songs. And you kept changing the dial until you came to a song that made you clap and sing. And we’ve kept our different tastes in music even until this day. Thank you for forgiving me for my more subdued musical preferences.

I want to be like you. Day after day, whether a difficult day or kinder one, you are the same. I can count on your warmth and kindness to me at the end of each day. Even when I find it difficult to come out of myself, and the dredges of my difficult eight hours, you remain encouraging and loving, thinking more about my needs than I sometimes think of yours.

I want to be like you. Christ lives in all of his children. And I know that he lives in me – frail and sometimes to be pitied. But when I look at you, I see Christ. And when I look into your face, I know that God loves me. Because I see Him in you.

I want to be like you, Ana, more than you’ll ever know.

A Verse I Came Across One Day…

I was reading in Jeremiah one day, and this verse gave me pause:

Jeremiah 6:16 – Thus says the LORD, |Stand you in the ways, and see, and ask for the old paths, where the good way is, and walk in it, and you shall find rest for your souls…

What is that “good way”? And what about the “rest for your souls”? It tells me that unless we’re walking in obedience to the Lord, we WILL NOT find that rest. But if we “ask for the old paths” (that which has been ordained by God from the beginning), and walk in them (in fellowship with Him), that “rest” is ours.

Why Do I Love Coffee Houses and Coffee So Much?

Why do I like coffee and coffee houses so much? That question hit me this afternoon. I had just gotten in my car for the long trip home from Raleigh. As I started my car, I realized I had a few swallows of coffee left over in a cup from earlier today. As I drank it, I began to smile, for it elevated my spirit – my mind filling with memories.

It wasn’t that long ago — maybe 6 years — when I made my first visit to a coffee house. Nicole had introduced Ana Maria and me to a small coffee shop on Western Boulevard. Ana and I hadn’t been married that long. This new experience was the first of a long line of new experiences.

Almost every Saturday after that, we would visit that coffee shop. We enjoyed all of the various coffees drawn from canisters lined up on a shelf along one wall. I remember the days we would sit and sip hot coffee for hours, planning where we would plant a flower garden, complete with rocks and shrubs, or discuss what color to paint the bedroom. On other visits, we would read scripture or read our Sunday School lesson. I remember when we were taking a special Bible study course, we would go to the coffee shop and review our lessons and do the homework, spending a large part of the day there.

But mostly, when we visited the coffee house, we talked – about everything! Somehow, Ana and I were lifted to a level of euphoria that can’t be understood or explained. And when the weather was cold or rainy, our moments conversing with one another over a cup of steaming hot coffee elevated our spirits even higher!

Why do I like coffee and coffee houses so much? Most days, I will only have one cup of coffee in the morning. It is not that I need alot of caffeine to get through the day, or that I cannot live without the taste. For what excites my senses the most are the memories of simple pleasures shared with the most wonderful and beautiful person in the world. Because of God’s goodness towards me, I have come to love coffee houses – and coffee.

I shall go to him, but he shall not return to me – 2 Sa 12:23

Within the last few weeks, our church family has lost a number of members to death – one was my sweet Aunt Janet, my father’s youngest sister. And today, we sang at the funeral of another dear brother in Christ. I am always reminded of the words of King David during times like these that the departed cannot come back to us, but we can go to them. And as the days go by, I become increasingly aware that our days are numbered, and that familiar faces are leaving from here and gathering over there.

Ever so often, I think of the post I made some time ago. I referenced one of the readings from “Our Daily Bread” which began with, “We are confident, yes, well pleased rather to be absent from the body and to be present with the Lord.” —2 Corinthians 5:8

A commentary followed which included a beautiful description of dying by Henry van Dyke:

“I am standing at the seashore. A ship at my side spreads her white sails to the morning breeze and starts for the blue ocean. I stand and watch her until, at length, she hangs like a speck of white cloud, just where the sea and sky come to mingle with each other. . . . And just at the moment when someone at my side says: ‘There, she is gone!’ there are other eyes watching her coming, and other voices ready to take up the glad shout: ‘Here she comes!’ And that is dying.”

Our Lord, has made the provisions for that last journey. It will be a moment when we close our eyes here, and wake up over there. It will be a day of unspeakable joy for the precious elect! Until that day, let’s make every day count for Him.

..that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead – 2 Corinthians 1:9

 We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers and sisters, about the troubles we experienced in the province of Asia. We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired of life itself. ⁹ Indeed, we felt we had received the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead – 2 Corinthians 1:8-9

Over the years, I know I’ve read that passage many times.  One day, as I read those two verses, it hit me –  the Apostle Paul testified that he went through such trials that the pressure and severity brought him to the point where he even “despaired of life”!  Here was a man who received direct revelations from our Lord!  He knew God’s presence in a way that few men have known.  Moved by the Holy Spirit, Paul wrote the letters that have become a part of the Holy Scriptures!  You would think that Paul, on a daily basis, depended and relied on God for everything.   And I’m sure he did on many levels.  But from what I read here, God allowed him to endure such hardship that its very purpose was to force Paul to shed the shearest veil of self-suffiency.  He proclaims, “But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead.”  Imagine that!  This man lived so close to God, and yet God pressed Paul to the point that Paul’s only comfort – and his only source of  hope – was the Lord Jesus. 

Most of the time, I think I’ve trusted God for everything – especially at times when I have everything.  And I feel I’ve sufficiently depended on the Lord, especially when everything is working just right.  But this year has brought such adversity - from many different directions, at the same time!  How easily I have felt, “Lord, what are you doing?  How can I get through all of these problems!” 

Ana and I have felt the Lord’s blessings so many times in so many ways.  And this past Labor Day weekend, we were blessed to move into a wonderful new home.  But I must admit – there were trials and tribulations almost at every turn!  In addition to the problems associated with the selling, buying and moving into a new home, terrific pressures have assailed me at work – to the point, I’ve prayed and longed for God to let me be able to retire from my present employment and find a new line of work.  Other matters have also risen that have placed Ana and myself under significant pressure.  We have close family members who have caused us heartache as we acknowledge that they are not all living in a manner that is consistent with God’s Word – the number of tears we have shed.

And then last week, my sweet wife was laid off from her job – cut backs.  After nine years of devoted service to her employer, she was laid off while newer temporary employees are allowed to stay.   So, we just bought this new house, and Ana loses her job.

What is the point in writing all of this?  Our closest friends have told us these trials are for my benefit – more than for Ana’s benefit.  She has taken things in stride, and she is excitedly waiting to see where God wants her to serve Him.  I have always felt that I trust and depend on God – sufficiently.  But the pressures that we have been under for the last months have tested me -  strained me – pressed me, and are teaching me that I must wholey lean on Christ and His promises.  The pressures have been overwhelming – God knows.  But I’m convinced more than ever that this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead.

What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes – James 4:14

On the way to work the other day, I caught myself thinking about how temporal things are.   We tend to think that everything will remain as it is, don’t we?  Several years ago, my wife and I used to visit a favorite coffee shop every single weekend.  As a matter of fact, we would spend hours there, drinking coffee, making plans, reading the Bible and holding wonderful conversations.  I thought we’d end up performing that same ritual for years to come.  But two or three years ago that coffee shop closed up.   It took awhile to find another suitable replacement, I might add.   But part of us stayed behind in that coffee shop. 

I think about things my wife and I enjoy presently.  We love to sing for the senior citizens at a local nursing home.  I take my guitar, and we sing old church hymns in duet.  And every so often, our choir director asks us to sing during Sunday worship.   During the Christmas season, Ana Maria and I help the Salvation Army by dressing in old 1860′s attire and ringing the bell.  We sing Christmas carols right there on the sidewalk!  We love all of this!  And this is what got me thinking.  We take for granted that we will always maintain the health and stamina to get out  and go places, singing and telling others about the Lord.  But there may come a day when we no longer are able to get out to the nursing home, or get up and sing at church.  We may be the recipients of someone else’s kindness and music.  

Ana Maria and I are now in our 50′s.  These are good years.  We do our best to stay active and serve the Lord each day with the strenghth and time He gives us.  I love where we are, but I know that things will not remain the same.  However, this is no cause to be discouraged!  We keep moving with steady anticipation toward that day – that day when we meet Him in the air and appear with Him at His coming!  Things will definitely no longer be the same!

Prayer of the Aged Believer

Our scripture reading last night was from “Our Daily Bread” – Psalm 71.  It was a delight to read this passage, which has been called “the prayer of the aged believer.”  It is indeed my prayer this day.    I thank God for his faithfulness.  

Psalm 71

 ¹ In You, O LORD, I put my trust;
         Let me never be put to shame.
 ² Deliver me in Your righteousness, and cause me to escape;
         Incline Your ear to me, and save me.
 ³ Be my strong refuge,
         To which I may resort continually;
         You have given the commandment to save me,
         For You are my rock and my fortress.
         
 ⁴ Deliver me, O my God, out of the hand of the wicked,
         Out of the hand of the unrighteous and cruel man.
 ⁵ For You are my hope, O Lord GOD;
         You are my trust from my youth.
 ⁶ By You I have been upheld from birth;
         You are He who took me out of my mother’s womb.
         My praise shall be continually of You.
         
 ⁷ I have become as a wonder to many,
         But You are my strong refuge.
 ⁸ Let my mouth be filled with Your praise
         And with Your glory all the day.
         
 ⁹ Do not cast me off in the time of old age;
         Do not forsake me when my strength fails.
 ¹⁰ For my enemies speak against me;
         And those who lie in wait for my life take counsel together,
 ¹¹ Saying, “God has forsaken him;
         Pursue and take him, for there is none to deliver him.”
         
 ¹² O God, do not be far from me;
         O my God, make haste to help me!
 ¹³ Let them be confounded and consumed
         Who are adversaries of my life;
         Let them be covered with reproach and dishonor
         Who seek my hurt.
         
 ¹⁴ But I will hope continually,
         And will praise You yet more and more.
 ¹⁵ My mouth shall tell of Your righteousness
         And Your salvation all the day,
         For I do not know their limits.
 ¹⁶ I will go in the strength of the Lord GOD;
         I will make mention of Your righteousness, of Yours only.
         
 ¹⁷ O God, You have taught me from my youth;
         And to this day I declare Your wondrous works.
 ¹⁸ Now also when I am old and grayheaded,
         O God, do not forsake me,
         Until I declare Your strength to this generation,
         Your power to everyone who is to come.
         
 ¹⁹ Also Your righteousness, O God, is very high,
         You who have done great things;
         O God, who is like You?
 ²⁰ You, who have shown me great and severe troubles,
         Shall revive me again,
         And bring me up again from the depths of the earth.
 ²¹ You shall increase my greatness,
         And comfort me on every side.
         
 ²² Also with the lute I will praise You—
         And Your faithfulness, O my God!
         To You I will sing with the harp,
         O Holy One of Israel.
 ²³ My lips shall greatly rejoice when I sing to You,
         And my soul, which You have redeemed.
 ²⁴ My tongue also shall talk of Your righteousness all the day long;
         For they are confounded,
         For they are brought to shame
         Who seek my hurt.

Helping Others Round the Bases

As I listened to our pastor’s sermon this past Sunday morning, I couldn’t help but think that one of the ministries of a Christian is to be a coach of sorts. The imagery in my mind was of a baseball coach posted at third base waving the runner on to home plate. And I see the same coach throwing his hands up to stop another runner from running into danger which could quite easily throw the runner out of play. The runner is so dependant on the coach to let him know whether to run, slide or go back to his last base of safety. Often the runner is not aware of what may be going on around him.

I want to be like that coach, as a Christian. As believers, we have the duty to warn other believers when there may be danger ahead as they run headlong towards an end that may not bring glory to God. And we are to encourage others to continue to run towards the mark that God has set ahead of them – to not give up or grow weary of well doing. But to be a good coach, we must live lives pleasing to God, dedicated to our Lord’s use. We want to be vessels fit for our Lord’s purpose. 2nd Timothy 2:20-21 says:

“But in a great house there are not only vessels of gold and silver, but also of wood and clay, some for honor and some for dishonor. Therefore if anyone cleanses himself from the latter, he will be a vessel for honor, sanctified and useful for the Master, prepared for every good work.”

That’s what we want, isn’t it – to be a vessel fit for “every good work” that God has prepared for us to do? Let that be our constant prayer.